Saturday, April 7, 2012

Body Image and my Wedding in a Month

Happy Weekend!

I have a nasty cold today so I am just going to stay home and try and finish some wedding projects.  This entails a lot of cutting, gluing, ink, and paper.  Every art majors dream weekend!

I will have some new projects to show you next week so keep a look out for it!

Also, I will be doing artist showcase tomorrow.  I haven't forgotten but I have this other topic rolling around in head and if I don't get it out I might just scream!

I wanted to talk about body image and weight today and how it applies to weddings and particularly my own.

In high school I had an eating disorder.  I didn't get my period, exercised three hours a day, was very, very thin, and very, very unhappy.

I gradually grew out of that mind set when I started college.  I still worked out everyday, but was eating and healthy and happier.

Going into my late twenties I began to struggle with my weight and I have fluctuated between being heavier and slightly thinner in the last few years.

I trained for a triathlon two years ago and was probably at my healthiest.  In November of 2011 I was running three miles everyday and feeling great, looking forward to being super healthy on my wedding day.

Then my disc in my neck blew and a range of allergic reactions to multiple medications have made steroids my friend. 

I had to stop exercising, and as all of you know I have been fighting with pain for the last six months or so.

What this comes down too is that I am probably at my heaviest that I have been in awhile....oh, and I am getting married in a month!

I my head I always thought I would be a thin bride.  That I would waltz down the isle in a size eight body.

I am not a size eight or a size ten for that matter and this past week I have been worrying about how I am going to look in our wedding photographs.  Am I going to look ugly?  Am I going to look fat?!  Is that what everyone is going to talk about on May 5, 2012?

As I was worrying about this last night I came across a great post on the blog Gala Darling.

Here is the line from the post that stuck out to me:
"YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE. Never be ashamed of that. Own it! Love it! You only have one life."

Then I realized I don't want to worry about this!  I'm not thin right now but that doesn't mean that I'm not going to own/rock my wedding day!  I am marrying a woman who not only loves me but also tells me I am gorgeous Every Single Day.

This is who I am right  This is what I look like, what my body is.  Do I want to be healthier?  Absolutely!  Do I NOT want to worry about it on my wedding day?  Damn Straight!

Lots of Love,


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